Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous. (Winston Churchill loved them).
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
3. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
4. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
5. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
6. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
7. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency, notify..."
I answered, "a doctor."
8. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
9. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
10. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
11. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Paraprosdokians, Word of The Day and Selected , Samples
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Paraprosdokians, Word of The Day and Selected , Samples
Last edited by Doka on 05-27-2020 12:50 AM, edited 1 time in total.
KARMA RULES
Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities, Can Make You Commit Atrocities': Voltaire
Those Who Can Make You Believe Absurdities, Can Make You Commit Atrocities': Voltaire
And A Few More
Nostalgia isn’t what it used to be.
To err is human, to really foul things up requires a computer.
It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
Evening news is where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
I was asked to name all the presidents…I thought they already had names.
Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, you will be a mile away and he won’t have any shoes.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
To err is human, to really foul things up requires a computer.
It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.
Evening news is where they begin with “Good evening” and then proceed to tell you why it isn’t.
I was asked to name all the presidents…I thought they already had names.
Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, you will be a mile away and he won’t have any shoes.
The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
A mind should not be so open that the brains fall out; however, it should not be so closed that whatever gray matter which does reside may not be reached. ART BELL
Everything Woke turns to -Donald Trump
Everything Woke turns to -Donald Trump