Political Humor
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bipartisan political bumper sticker
At last, a bumper sticker for both parties.
FINALLY, someone has come out with a 100% bipartisan political bumper sticker. The hottest selling bumper sticker comes from New York State . . . .
"RUN HILLARY RUN"
Democrats put it on the rear bumper.
Republicans put it on the front bumper.
FINALLY, someone has come out with a 100% bipartisan political bumper sticker. The hottest selling bumper sticker comes from New York State . . . .
"RUN HILLARY RUN"
Democrats put it on the rear bumper.
Republicans put it on the front bumper.
1N73LL1G3NC3 15 7H3 4B1L17Y 704D4P7 70 CH4NG3.
-573PH3N H4WK1NG
-573PH3N H4WK1NG
- Shimmering Auro
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NEW DEMOCRATIC BUMPER STICKERS FOR '08:
Bush: End of an Error
That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway
If You Can Read This, You're Not Our President
America: One Nation, Under Surveillance
No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade Iraq?
We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them
When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46
The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century
Terrorism, it ain't just for Muslims anymore
What do you get when you mix a donkey and an elephant? I don't know but even the platypus are disgusted with it
Hey, Washington DC, YOU'RE FIRED!
Bush: End of an Error
That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway
If You Can Read This, You're Not Our President
America: One Nation, Under Surveillance
No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade Iraq?
We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them
When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46
The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century
Terrorism, it ain't just for Muslims anymore
What do you get when you mix a donkey and an elephant? I don't know but even the platypus are disgusted with it
Hey, Washington DC, YOU'RE FIRED!
shimmeringaurora(at)yahoo(dot)com
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Hillary Clinton's Indian name
Senator Hillary Clinton was invited to address a major gathering of The American Indian nation two weeks ago in upper New York State. She spoke for almost an hour on her future plans for increasing every Native American's present standard of living, should she one day become the first female President.
She referred to her career as a New York Senator, how she had signed "yes" for every Indian issue that came to her desk for approval. Although the Senator was vague on the details of her plan, she seemed most enthusiastic about her future ideas for helping her "red sisters and brothers".
At the conclusion of her speech, the Tribes presented the Senator with a plaque inscribed with her new Indian name - Walking Eagle.
The proud Senator then departed in her motorcade, waving to the crowds. A news reporter later inquired of the group of chiefs of how they had come to select the new name given to the Senator.
They explained that Walking Eagle is the name given to a bird so full of sh!t it can no longer fly.
Senator Hillary Clinton was invited to address a major gathering of The American Indian nation two weeks ago in upper New York State. She spoke for almost an hour on her future plans for increasing every Native American's present standard of living, should she one day become the first female President.
She referred to her career as a New York Senator, how she had signed "yes" for every Indian issue that came to her desk for approval. Although the Senator was vague on the details of her plan, she seemed most enthusiastic about her future ideas for helping her "red sisters and brothers".
At the conclusion of her speech, the Tribes presented the Senator with a plaque inscribed with her new Indian name - Walking Eagle.
The proud Senator then departed in her motorcade, waving to the crowds. A news reporter later inquired of the group of chiefs of how they had come to select the new name given to the Senator.
They explained that Walking Eagle is the name given to a bird so full of sh!t it can no longer fly.
None of us is as smart as ALL of us...
Worse Than We Thought
An older couple had a son, who was still living with his parents. The parents were a little worried, as the son was still unable to decide about his career path... so they decided to do a small test.
They took a ten-dollar bill, a Bible, and a bottle of whiskey, and put them on the front hall table. Then they hid, hoping he would think they weren't at home.
The father told the mother, "If he takes the money he will be a businessman, if he takes the Bible he will be a priest - but if he takes the bottle of whiskey, I'm afraid our son will be a drunkard."
So the parents took their place in the nearby closet and waited nervously. Peeping through the keyhole they saw their son arrive home. He saw the note they had left, saying they'd be home later. Then, he took the 10-dollar bill, looked at it against the light, and slid it in his pocket.
After that, he took the Bible, flicked through it, and took it also.
Finally, he grabbed the bottle, opened it, and took an appreciative whiff to be assured of the quality. Then he left for his room, carrying all the three items.
The father slapped his forehead, and said: "Darn, it's even worse than I ever imagined..."
"What do you mean?" his wife inquired.
"Our son is going to be a politician!" replied the concerned father.
They took a ten-dollar bill, a Bible, and a bottle of whiskey, and put them on the front hall table. Then they hid, hoping he would think they weren't at home.
The father told the mother, "If he takes the money he will be a businessman, if he takes the Bible he will be a priest - but if he takes the bottle of whiskey, I'm afraid our son will be a drunkard."
So the parents took their place in the nearby closet and waited nervously. Peeping through the keyhole they saw their son arrive home. He saw the note they had left, saying they'd be home later. Then, he took the 10-dollar bill, looked at it against the light, and slid it in his pocket.
After that, he took the Bible, flicked through it, and took it also.
Finally, he grabbed the bottle, opened it, and took an appreciative whiff to be assured of the quality. Then he left for his room, carrying all the three items.
The father slapped his forehead, and said: "Darn, it's even worse than I ever imagined..."
"What do you mean?" his wife inquired.
"Our son is going to be a politician!" replied the concerned father.
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The Pope took a couple of days off to visit the Rugged Mountains of Alaska for some sightseeing. He was cruising along the campground in the Popemobile when there was a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods. A helpless Democrat, wearing sandals, shorts, a "Save the Whales" hat, and a "To Hell with Bush" T-shirt, was screaming while struggling frantically and thrashing around trying to free himself from the grasp of a 10-foot grizzly.
As the Pope watched in horror, a group of Republican loggers came racing up
One quickly fired a 44 magnum into the bear's chest. The other two reached up and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious Democrat from the bear's grasp.
Then using long clubs, the three loggers finished off the bear and two of them threw it onto the bed of their truck while the other tenderly placed the injured Democrat in the back seat.
As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions!" he told them. "I heard there was a bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic Environmental activists but now I've seen with my own eyes that this is not true."
As the Pope drove off, one of the loggers asked his buddies "Who was that guy?" "It was the Pope," another replied. "He's in direct contact with Heaven and has access to all wisdom."
"Well," the logger said, "he may have access to all wisdom but he sure doesn't know anything about Grizzly bear hunting! By the way, is the bait holding up, or do we need to go back to Massachusetts and get another one?
As the Pope watched in horror, a group of Republican loggers came racing up
One quickly fired a 44 magnum into the bear's chest. The other two reached up and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious Democrat from the bear's grasp.
Then using long clubs, the three loggers finished off the bear and two of them threw it onto the bed of their truck while the other tenderly placed the injured Democrat in the back seat.
As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over. "I give you my blessing for your brave actions!" he told them. "I heard there was a bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic Environmental activists but now I've seen with my own eyes that this is not true."
As the Pope drove off, one of the loggers asked his buddies "Who was that guy?" "It was the Pope," another replied. "He's in direct contact with Heaven and has access to all wisdom."
"Well," the logger said, "he may have access to all wisdom but he sure doesn't know anything about Grizzly bear hunting! By the way, is the bait holding up, or do we need to go back to Massachusetts and get another one?
None of us is as smart as ALL of us...
Some political humor from the Smothers Brothers...
seems some things haven't changed since the '60s!
Who's Running the Country
Smart Juice for Washington
seems some things haven't changed since the '60s!
Who's Running the Country
Smart Juice for Washington
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- Pirate
- Posts: 45448
- Joined: 03-06-2003 03:00 AM